Bar Review: Joe’s, Fullerton, CA


Have you ever had that hankering for a good old rattlesnake sausage to go with your Martini?  Yes?  Well I have the place for you; Joe’s No Limits Bar & Grill in Fullerton.

If you follow my blog you know that I favor Steakhouses and Seafood Restaurants.  Joe’s doesn’t quite fit that profile, but it is not a dive  bar by any means.   It really is a local sports ‘bar and grill’.

With a twist.…  Rattlesnake, Rabbit, Duck, Wild Boar, or Alligator; its all part of Joe’s selection of home made, or home specified, sausages.   For the less adventuresome, there is the more traditional Bratwurst, Polish, or Louisiana Hot Links.  And of course the traditional assortment of Burgers, Pizzas, and Sandwiches.  But you have to try the Wild Boar sausage, its awesome!

There are three sections to Joe’s.  In the front there is the “Bar”, in the back there is the Piano ‘lounge’ with several tables, and outside there is the smoker’s patio.  Throughout there are plentiful TVs on which you will find all the currents sports events.  In the evenings, and whenever he feels like it, the owner will play the piano.  And he’s pretty good!  They also have trios and duos come in and play.

The decor is not really decor.  It’s more decoration.  And its eclectic to say the least, but fun.  Lots of automotive items mixed with old tools and Americana.  All wrapped in permanent colored Christmas lights.

So ordering a Martini is probably not your first thought here, despite the obvious full bar dead center in the bar area.  No, you would likely think beer and they do have a  good selection on tap.

But the Martinis are really very good!  Perfectly chilled, nicely mixed, amply poured.  The bartenders know what they’re doing here.  Now that I know better, I’ll absolutely be ordering Martinis!

Joe’s isn’t the place you come just for a martini, so it only gets one, very well deserved, martini stem.   Martini Glass Upright

As for gin selection, I don’t really know.  I wasn’t paying attention at the time I ordered my martini, it was sort of a ‘lark’.  But I promise to go back and make note and update this blog.



How Dry Can You Go?

Vermouth Ad 1

How Dry is Dry?  Can a Martini by “too” Dry?   It’s a subject that attracts a lot of humor, such as:

“A perfect martini should be made by filling a glass with gin then waving it in the general direction of Italy.”
Noël Coward

“I would like to observe the vermouth from across the room while I drink my martini.”
Sir Winston Churchill

The subject also garners some waxing philosophical…. such as:

“I’d like  dry martini, Mr. Quoc, a very dry martini.  A very dry, arid, barren, desiccated, veritable dust-bowl of a martini.  I want a martin that could be declared a disaster area.  Mix me just such a martini”
Hawkeye Pierce.

Clearly a Martini can only be ‘so dry’, as once there is zero Vermouth in the drink, there can be no less and thus no drier.  But the two quotes above provide an humorous implied ‘dryness’ level based upon how remotely the cocktail can be referenced to Vermouth, or its home country Italy.

Which brings me to my latest ‘driest martini’ story:

A man sits down at the bar in the RMS Queen Mary on its way from England to the US.  He asks the bartender for a very dry Martini.  The bartender responds, “Sir, we make the driest martini here on the Queen Mary”.  The man looks a bit unsure and asks, “How do you know that you have the driest Martini?”  The bartender replies, “Well half way through the voyage we will pass the SS United States.  When we do that I go to the top deck with our bottle of Vermouth and the United States Bartender goes to the top of his deck with his bottle and we salute Italy”.

It seems there will always be some debate about the driest of the dry.  And that’s a great thing as it is always in good fun and provides us with a laugh or three.

Of course I like my Martini with just a hint of Vermouth, what one bar keep referred to as “In-n-Out”*.  A Martini without any Vermouth is really just chilled Gin in a martini stem.

As I’ve commented before, “A martini stem does not a Martini make”.

(These quotes and jokes, and more, can be found on the “Martini Quotes” and “Martini Jokes” pages.)

*In-n-Out Martini:  Take a capful of Vermouth and pour it over your ice, swirl the Vermouth around the ice and then drain the Vermouth.


Friday Funny

TAPS Martini

A businessman enters a tavern, sits down at the bar, and orders a double martini. After he finishes the drink, he peeks inside his shirt pocket and then orders the bartender to prepare another double martini.  After he finishes that it, he again peeks inside his shirt pocket and orders the bartender to bring another double martini.

The bartender says, “Look, buddy, I’ll bring ya’ martinis all night long – but you gotta tell me why you look inside your shirt pocket before you order a refill.” The customer replies, “I’m peeking at a photo of my wife. When she starts to look good, I know it’s time to go home.”

For more fun Martini jokes check out the appropriately titled “Martini Jokes” page, or click the link: Martini Jokes.

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Random Martini Quote of the Day

“Christmas at my house is always at least six or seven times more pleasant than anywhere else. We start drinking early. While everyone else is seeing only one Santa Claus, we’ll be seeing six or seven.”
W.C. Fields


If you haven’t check out our “Martini Quotes” page in a while you’ll be pleasantly surprised by some new additions, including many by W.C. Fields.

Also, If you like these posts and want to be notified by email when they come in, please subscribe to the blog…. over on the left column.     😉

New W.L. Fields Quotes added to Quotes Page

W.C. Fields

I’ve recently come across a collection of W. C. Fields’ Martini and cocktail quotes.  I’m always looking for such quotes to add to my existing quote page  (Martini Quotes) and have added these latest finds.

No collection of bar quotes would be complete without some of Mr. Fields’ musings and we can all quote a few of his more famous comments, but I never realized how prolific he was.  Here are my latest additions:

“…more people are driven insane through religious hysteria than by drinking alcohol.”

Now don’t say you can’t swear off drinking; it’s easy. I’ve done it a thousand times.

How well I remember my first encounter with The Devil’s Brew. I happened to stumble across a case of bourbon — and went right on stumbling for several days thereafter.

Back in my rummy days, I would tremble and shake for hours upon arising. It was the only exercise I got.

Thou shalt not kill anything less than a fifth.

Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s house unless they have a well-stocked bar.

Somebody’s been putting pineapple juice in my pineapple juice!

Charlie McCarthy: “Say, Mr. Fields, I read in the paper where you consumed two quarts of liquor a day. What would your father think about that?” WC: “He’d think I was a sissy.”

I don’t believe in dining on an empty stomach.

Say anything that you like about me except that I drink water.

Of course, now I touch nothing stronger than buttermilk: 90-proof buttermilk.

Some weasel took the cork out of my lunch.

I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve.

I seldom took a drink on the set before 9 a.m.

(Fields gave this rationale for not drinking water:) “Fish f**k in it.”

(Fields, who never got falling-down drunk, explained why:) “When you woo a wet goddess, there’s no use falling at her feet.”

Fields’ retort from his dressing room after a director had shouted, “Camera reloading!” – “Fields reloading!”

(After a Universal executive wondered aloud if Fields drank all the time, the enraged comedian retorted:) “I certainly do not drink all the time. I have to sleep you know.”

I was in love with a beautiful blonde once. She drove me to drink; that’s the one thing I’m indebted to her for.

“I take inordinate pride in my nose. Indeed, I have treatment done on it every day” (At this point, Fields lifts a glass.) “My daily treatment.”

My illness is due to my doctor’s insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies.

I like to keep a bottle of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy.

Sleep…the most beautiful experience in life–except drink.

Christmas at my house is always at least six or seven times more pleasant than anywhere else. We start drinking early. While everyone else is seeing only one Santa Claus, we’ll be seeing six or seven.”

Just a little info on Mr. Fields for those interested (courtesy of Wikipedia):

W. C. Fields  (January 29, 1880 – December 25, 1946), was an American comedian, actor, juggler and writer.  Fields’ comic persona was a misanthropic and hard-drinking egotist, who remained a sympathetic character despite his snarling contempt for dogs and children.

His career in show business began in vaudeville, where he attained international success as a silent juggler. He gradually incorporated comedy into his act, and was a featured comedian in the Ziegfeld Follies for several years. He became a star in the Broadway musical comedy Poppy (1923), in which he played a colorful small-time con man. His subsequent stage and film roles were often similar scoundrels, or else henpecked everyman characters.